How I create an attainable New Years goal

A new year is upon us! Time for our Facebook feeds to be bogged down by gym memberships and the latest diet fads. Inspirational quotes will be so abundant you’ll recite them in your sleep. And your Aunt Sally will remind you it’s a new year, new you! But between all the “better you” preparation and hefty New Years resolutions, there’s got to be some balance, right? I’m not sure if I’ve ever picked a New Years resolution/goal and sticked with it. In theory it seems like a great idea. New Year-new beginnings. But what’s the point if we can’t stick to them and all they do is create stress?

Last year I sat in therapy wondering why my postpartum depression wasn’t getting any better. I found myself frustrated with the process until my therapist suggested I lay out an attainable goal for myself. No half marathons or intense food plans, but a small and effective goal. Something I could work on everyday that benefited myself, my family, and my aspirations as a mother. This seemed like a lofty idea to fit into one tiny goal, but when I broke it down and thought about one thing I’d been missing in my life it seemed a bit more attainable.

My 2018 Goal

Communication. I don’t think I’ve ever had great communication skills, but in 2018 I needed to work on them. I left 2017 with so much frustration and anger-determined to make a change. Communication was the one tangible goal I could work on everyday. And that’s exactly what I did! I changed how I was communicating with my friends, my family, my husband, and ESPECIALLY my toddler. Of course I failed at times, especially in the beginning. No goal starts without flaws, and I certainly didn’t end 2018 a communication perfectionist. But I did see some positives!

We all know toddlers can be…toddlers are…toddlers have layers-like an onion! Anyone else a Shrek fan?? My toddler has plenty of layers. So many layers that I have completely pushed mine aside to make room for all the space hers take up. And that’s ok right now because she needs me. But sometimes, like a video game, those layers are frustrating as hell. As my toddler became more of a threenager and less of that sweet little angel we all tell ourselves are kids are, I knew we needed to change things.

And that is where communication came into play. A good blogging friend of mine, Kelly Bandas, talks a lot about positive parenting. So much so that I joined her Facebook group and did some extensive research on it. Communication is a huge part of positive parenting, so it was easy for us to adopt this “style” of parenting and helped me enforce my communication goal.

So what about 2019?

As the new year has already arrived and I start that new diet plan tomorrow (HAHAA), I have finally picked a new goal for 2019.

TIME.

My time management sucked in 2018. Looking back I feel ask though I accomplished less than I have when I was pregnant. I’m not talking about micromanaging my time, but more-so being careful with it. Realizing there is a place and time for certain things. It’s ok to have a lazy day, but when it turns into a week, how can I avoid that? Maybe binging the newest season of black mirror is less important than sleep.

And knowing I might fail at times is actually a helpful thing. I missed the communication mark completely last year when it came to texting people back in a timely manner. I’m surprised (and grateful) I still have friends after days of not responding because life and my terrible time management get in the way. But going into 2019 knowing I need to STILL work on communication, and choosing my time wisely are two goals I can work on everyday. Two attainable goals to help me be a better friend, partner, mother, and person!

I’d love to hear from you all! Do you set resolutions or goals for the new year? How do you stick to them??

Lifestyle, Uncategorized
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